There he is. I can see him through the car window. He’s trying out the roof of City Hall this time. Rudolph Giuliani always is a little man in search of a balcony.

We pull up to what was once the public entrance to the plaza and steps of City Hall in New York City, a lovely old building where once they held a wake for Abraham Lincoln and a wonderful, shrieking celebration for Charles A. Lindbergh.

And now they have black iron picket fences and gates stopping any car from going in without a... [More]

A drunk stumbles along a Baptismal service on a Sunday afternoon down by the river. He proceeds to stumble down into the water and stands next to the Minister. The Minister turns, notices the old drunk and says,

“Mister, are you ready to find Jesus?”

The drunk looks back and says, “Yes sir, I am.”

The Minister then dunks the fellow under the water and pulls him right back up.

“Have you found Jesus?” the Minister asked.

“No, I didn’t!” said the drunk.

The Minister then dunks him under for... [More]

http://www.theonion.com/onion3616/american_people.html

http://www.theonion.com/onion3612/us_population.html

http://www.theonion.com/onion3608/wdyt_3608.html

(I like Jenkowitz)

FBI To Require Background Checks For Child-Care Providers.

Girlfriend has never seen Apocalypse Now.